I was reading an article online about dating and where to find a really great guy with old fashioned values (for the record, the values are not old fashioned, they are classic and should never go out of style). The article said that if you are looking for a good man who is loyal and family oriented, you should ask your married friends to set up with someone, and to even consider asking ex boyfriends to arrange a set up. Great idea. I have married friends, and also who else would know me better than someone who dated me? When I start dating again I am seriously considering it.
I have not been set up in many years. And I have only been on two blind dates. The first was in 1996, when my sister set me up with a man I fell madly in love with, pretty much instantly. The other blind date in 2006 turned out to be one of the worst blind date horror stories ever. I do have to thank him, the Blind Date of 2006, for taking himself out of my dating pool when he told me he “only did 8 balls (coke and heroine, I think?) on holidays or really special occasions.” A 50/50 shot is not bad. So to all my married friends reading this…set me up. You know what I like and that which I am looking. Old fashioned, has integrity and honor, is spiritual, smart, respectful, family oriented, funny, kind…
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You’re not a bad person, you’re just in pain. – Charlie, Scent of a Woman
The guest and I watched Scent of a Woman last night. Al Pacino is an incredible actor plays that role so well, with so much heartbreaking subtlety. Pacino’s performance allows you to see the characters desperate loneliness, his need for someone to be there for him, to accept him, to be loyal to him. There are so many lessons and things to take away from that movie too. Honor, integrity. loyalty. Loving someone even though they are difficult and cantankerous (seldom used word, and yet such a good one). It takes much Grace to love and accept someone so difficult. And yet Charlie’s character does it, reluctantly at first, gratefully at the end.
And it highlights the issues on integrity, character, and having principals. These are words not often practiced in today’s society. And people who posses these traits, who are not afraid to stand up for the right thing, are not common anymore. I am very picky about who I let into my life, and that is why. In the past I let in people who were not up to par in the area of these standards, and I learned my lesson.
But there is a difference in doing the right thing, which may be very difficult, and sacrificing your own health or happiness for someone else. Some do get the two confused. As much as God put me on this Earth to be of service to others, I cannot and will not sacrifice myself for another. That is not healthy, and if you are going to be good for others, if you are going to raise emotionally healthy and happy children, you must first be happy and emotionally happy yourself. To be the best you can be for others, especially those you love, you must first be selfish enough to take care of yourself.
Character is doing the right thing when no one is looking. – JC Watts
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I am enjoying having The Guest with me. Last night there was movie watching on the couch and light housework. Tonight dinner is in the crock pot and it will be ready by the time I get home. Nice. Then some more light housework, maybe laundry, a bit more TV and just general conversation. I like having someone around the house, another life form other than my plants and my cats, who often eat the plants. Yes, The Guest is just what the doctor ordered right now.
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