I Don’t Want to Wait

There comes a point in life where you simply do not want to wait anymore.  They say patience is a virtue, and yes I agree.  But when you know what you want, patience can be hard to do.  And I know what I want.  And in life that is half the battle.  Once you know what you want you can do what is needed to make it happen.

For the last nine years I have taken care of everyone. I put large parts of my life on hold while I did what was needed for the family.  Putting a nephew through college, taking care of Mom and Dad, then taking a year or so to recover and get my life back on track.

Now everyone is settled.  No one needs so much care that it takes over my life.  I can finally start living for me, building what I want life to be, And what I want it to be is full of love and happiness.  Full of smiles, laughter, travel, writing, and everything that is good. But I do not want these things by myself, I want to build them with someone else.

I have done many things on my own.  I have traveled, taken care of family, built my career, and lived an entire life by myself,  Now it is time to let someone else in.  Now it is time to build with another.

Because I don’t want to wait until I ma 80 to find the love of my life. I had to wait until there was room for another, which took many years and a lot longer than I thought.  I tried to build with others before, but my life was so big that it engulfed everything around it, relationships included.  Now that life is smaller, it is finally time to extrapolate the details and engineer the plans.  There is fertile steady ground beneath, an open heart, and a willing soul.

That is the thing about life, it is what we make it.  Yes, there are plenty of things out of our control, so we must be careful with what is in our own hands.  That is one of the many reasons why living with a purpose is so important. And I want to guild with purpose, write with purpose, and if I am vulnerable and share my heart, I want to do that with a purpose too.  When we do that, we are authentic and we will get that authenticity returned to us. We will attract it.

And so I don’t to wait any more, until this is done, or that is over. The time is now. Life is not slowing down and today is not a dress rehearsal.  And I take a deep breath and a leap of faith. And I cannot wait. I am excited to see how beautiful it all becomes.