By the Grace of God Go I

They say that well behaved women never make history, and that you can’t play it safe and live an extraordinary life.  It is also said that you have to take risks to accomplish anything. I’ve always been a bit of a gambler, taking risks and banking on my faith and ability to work hard to see it through. Sometimes I lose, but most of the time I win, and I grow and learn every time.

When I was just out of high school, I applied for a job at a radio station just to get a tour of the studio and ended up getting the job.  Just decided that day and took the risk and took the job even though I had no experience. And it worked out as a career for almost 15 years.

A few years later when taking a private acting class, the instructor was tired of seeing bad Shakespeare from people who thought they were good, so he banned it from his class. He said anyone caught doing Shakespeare better be good enough to impress him, and no one had yet. But I knew I could do it. So I practiced until I was great, did the monologue and then held my breath and waited. His response was “I said you better be damn good to do Shakespeare in my glass and not get kicked out.  And you were damn good.”

Then many years later I moved from Columbus to Atlanta, which doesn’t sound like a risky gamble…except I didn’t have a job or a place to live when I drove the loaded U-Haul. I took the risk that I would find a place to live that day…and I did. I looked at one house, paid the deposit and unloaded the truck. And I found a job the next day. But a big risk. What if it hadn’t worked out?

In 2010 I quit my nice stable job in finance that I hated in order to start my own writing business. No back up plan, just getting out there, working hard and praying harder. It was in the middle of the recession in Atlanta, after the housing market had crashed. Business was slow, times were tight, money was short and the hours were long. There were many 16-18 hour days then, as I was also putting my nephew through college. I was so exhausted, but I still worked hard and prayers harder and it worked out. I made a name for myself and now have a great career. But it is by the Grace of God that I have been able to do so well, because everyone who has hired me has been willing to take a chance on me. And I have done my best to earn that.

I gambled big once again when I relocated to Texas – moved to a house that I had only seen online and not in person. I said a prayer, paid the deposits, packed up everything and headed south with a friend, my plants, and my cats. Who does that?? I do. And it turned out great. This was the one of the best decisions I have ever made.

And now, I’ve made another huge gamble, rolling the dice, praying and working hard, to make it happen. And by the Grace of God, I rolled all sevens. Jackpot.

After a lot of prayers, hard work, phone calls and negotiating, it has all come together. Which is huge. Because this was the biggest gamble of my life.  And there were times I got discouraged and doubted whether or not it would work. So I would pray. And all I can say is that but by the Grace of God go I. Because the odds were rather lopsided.

Recently I read a an article that talks about choosing your hard. It outlines how being overweight is hard, getting in and staying in shape is hard. Choose your hard. Being poor is hard, saving money is hard — choose your hard. The article went through a whole list like that, and it truly resonated with me when I read it. So when I got discouraged, I would remember that article and think about choosing my hard. What hard did I want, if I get to choose?

But with God and my faith, none of this would have worked.  I am an excellent writer, but I couldn’t have accomplished any of this without those people believing in me and giving me the chance. Because they just as easily could have told me no. So many pieces and legs to this plan that I hatched and the risks taken, but everything has lines up. And the relief felt is palpable.

And so my knees hit the floor as I cry and give thanks for being so very blessed. and I am acutely aware of my blessings

Speak to me

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