Happy Stresses

While sitting at the car place waiting to get my emission test done, I read an article about stresses and the adverse affects on the human body. Indeed, stress can wreak havoc on us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. And no matter what we we all experience stress in our lives, the important thing is how we handle it, how we seek relief. For me, I try to laugh a lot, drink some and a lot of sex (my parents are gone so I can say that. and my friends who read this will just be happy for me). I try to get some physical activity and I also pray.

Certainly there has been a lot of stress in my life as of late. While it is what I call good stress, it’s still stress. Good stress is stress that is attached to positive things in your life. For me bad stress is just the opposite, all the stresses attached to bad or painful events or things. And I have to say, there is an extreme difference that can be felt in every part of the body and soul.

What is good stress? It’s the stress from looking for and find a new house. Making bids, having inspections done, considering repairs, and negotiating prices, the deals falling through and starting over. We are looking at more houses this weekend and hopefully will find “The One.”

Work has been crazy busy with deadlines and projects. Again, not a bad problem to have, It reminds me to be thankful that I do have a career which I love. The down side of writing and working from home is that there can be a fuzzy line between work and life balance. When you are a writer, your mind is always running with things to write. And working from home you can’t just leave work at the office…because the office is right there. And that is probably what I have trouble with the most.

Another thing that can be done to reduce stresses is to part ways with those who do not serve us. Friendships that have run their course, people who no longer make time for your or who make excuses when you try to make time for them. When the friendship is no longer reciprocated, then it is time to walk, And that doesn’t mean that they are a bad person, just that it is no longer a productive friendship and needs to be let go.

Sleep also helps. I recently bought a fitbit knock-off that shows my steps and sleep patterns. As it turns out. I get more deep sleep than that light sleep. Which is great and I can fell when I don’t. But getting proper rest is extremely important to being able to handle stress and proper cognitive function.

Life is short. Stresses happen. But stress doesn’t mean life is bad. If you use stress properly it can be a motivator, because you know that the stress is only temporary. That still means you must take care of yourself – get rest and do whatever it is that helps you deal and lesson the affects. And hopefully, the stresses are die to making a happy life. And it’s worth it.

The Day After

Memory is a strange thing in life. I don’t remember what I did the day after my Mom died. Or the day after or the day after. But things got done. Life continued on with work, traffic, bills, and everything else, even though it seemed the world was moved of it’s axis. And that is what life does, it continues by its very nature.

And every day, I built better, grew stronger, prayed more, and slowly moved forward even in the white out blizzard conditions of grief. Until one day, it was today. Five years later.

Five years. Wow. I have worked hard, taken thousands of steps, over millions of miles, carried all that I own in every type of container, in boats, cars, trucks, and planes. It has taken prayer, long hours, years, and an extraordinary amount of heartbeats. But here I am.

Yes, here I am, in this place, in this moment, in this step, this breath, this everything. Every atom in the universe has conspired and implored me to be right where I am.

And where I am is beautiful. Finally, I am where I have worked and prayed so hard to be. Surrounded by good friends in this place I have come to love and call home. A career that has been crazy busy, about to buy another house, getting everything together, and attempting to keep my current house clean. And I am here with the love of my life, which I’d amazing in and of itself.

The main thing is that all the struggle, all the hardship, all the heartbreak, all the disappointment, all the everything- its all worth it. Because it doesn’t last long and will eventually lead you where you need to be. And when you get there, you and your life will be more rich, more beautiful, and much deeper than you ever thought possible, with a patina borne from surviving and overcoming it all. And there is no shine like that of perseverance. After all, the universe has no choice but to fall in love with a stubborn heart.

Life is short. But some how, everything fits. All the adventure and love and heartache and the good, bad, and the ugly. And it’s all worth it. So keep your heard up, remember what your knees are for, have faith, and hang on because the light is at the end of the tunnel. It all works out. You just have to get through it, that’s all. And you will. And when you do, the view on the other side is spectacular. I’ll meet you there,

5 Years

Five years, is 60 months, or 260 weeks, or 1,826 hours and countless hours. And more heartbeats than I can count. And in that time there has been everything good, bad, ugly, happy and in between. But mostly, five years has been without you Mom. Five years without hearing vou, or hugging you or seeing your being with you or having coffee with you.

Mom, there are no words to even express how much I still miss you or what these last five years have been like. So there is no point in trying.

What I can say is that I am OK. I miss you every day. But this life I have built here, in this place, is a life that I am proud of and one I think you would be proud of too.

I love and miss you so much. I miss our conversations, our laughs, our late night movie marathons, card games, and conversations. And I miss our talks over coffee.

I love you and you will always be more best friend. Thank you for being the best Mom in the world. Give dad a hug for me (I miss him too). And please visit me in my dreams.

Sharing Home

One of the nest things about going back home to Georgia, after having been away for 16 long months, is seeing my friends again. Actually seeing them, in the flesh, and hearing their voices, seeing their facial expressions when they talk, hearing their laugh and just being in their physical presence. And he one thing though could make it better? Introducing them to my man. And it was glorious.

It was a weekend of laughter and hugs, and so much good food. There were smiles and glasses of wine and f=glasses of tea and stories and catching up. But mostly there was joy – pure, simple, unadulterated joy of being home and sharing that with my partner.

Life is short. Share it with those you love. Visit people you care about. Make time to catch up. Because those friendships are priceless. And in a world that seems to be going crazy, it’s those who love you, and those whom you love, who will keep you grounded and your heart safe.