It is November, the month of thanks. And our feeds are flooded with thankfulness and reminders of how sweet life is. We make lists of all that we are thankful for. And indeed, we should be thankful everyday, even for the small things. Because no matter how bad we have it, someone out there has it worse. Because the thinks that we take for granted every day, someone out there is praying for those very things.
We all go through hard times in life no matter how well put together we are. We all feel pain, loss, frustration, disappointment, depression, panic even or fear. But we get through them, mostly.And I have long had a theory in life that no matter what happened, we should always look at what we have learned from an experience, no matte how painful it might have been. Much easier in theory that in practice. But this exercise brought me right back there. I find it is this type of mindset that keeps one from getting bitter.
And we have all met those bitter people, who know every morning when they get up that the world is against them in one way or another. Why do people insist on hanging onto their pain? I don’t know, Because it seems to take a lot of energy to be angry all the time. And quite frankly, I don’t have the time for that.
But I do have time to participate in a week a gratitude challenge. One the second day, the challenge was to think about a hard time in life and answer for questions about that time. My mind goes back to the 2.5 years after Mom died and all the challenges that followed. Taking care of my terminally ill father, him dying shortly after Mom, estate issues, my extremely shattered heart, and lots of family drama (I swore I was going to see Jerry Springer pull up with a huge bucket of popcorn).
What did it teach me? It taught me that I was much stronger than I ever thought I was, that I could handle much more than I ever thought, and that I am kind of a bad ass. It taught me that you can cut toxic people out of your life even if they are family. It taugh me that I do not need anyone’s permission or approval to live my life as I see fit. It taught me to walk away from those who are so bitter that all they can do is hate. It taught me that I am not responsible to other’s baggage and issues, and leave them with those whom they belong. It taught me the true importance of friends and having quality people in your life that truly care about you and will help you when you are too shattered to help yourself.
What other good things are happening right now? Amazing things are happening right now – a great career that i love, a wonderful move that will be a new beginning, Lots of love and also having the wonderful network of friends that I have built over the years. And all of those things are multiplying.
How could this hard time be a blessing in disguise? While I cannot say that losing my parens was a blessing, I can say that I have been extremely blessed since taking care of them. While this past year has been hard rebuilding my life, it is rebuilt on solid and fertile ground. I have taken all that I have learned and applied it to this amozing life and the new chapters that are to come.
What are the gifts of this situation? The gifts of the current situation are too many to list. I can say that I am blessed to have the gift of a clear conscience. As I move forward there is no one to hold my back, no ties to hold me down and the world is mine to make it whatever I want. Truly the possibilities are endless. And I am excited.
And for all of these things, and much , much more, I have gratitude.
Life is short. So make it spectacular. And know that even the hard times, the harshest winters in life will bear fruit. Because when the spring comes we appreciate it that much more.