There have been many scientific studies about empaths and how they take on and absorb the feelings of others. It is also well known that empaths notice certain things about people that may be others do not quite pick up on. Empths tend to be more noticing of someone’s energy and their mood. And typically empaths are very nurturing by Nature, they are very giving and I love taking care of the people they love.
The first time I read about the characteristics of an empath with several years ago, and it immediately struck a chord. That is when I recognized that I am to an empath. And so I started to guard myself against toxic people, and people with a lot of negative energy. Now everyone goes through a tough time in their life, and I’m not talking about those people. I mean the kind of people who suck the life and light out of every situation and any room that they happen to be in. I think it is exhausting to deal with people like that in the first place, but if you are an empath it’s even worse.
Because empaths are naturally giving people, it is also very easy for them to,be taken adventage of. And this indeed is something I’ve had to watch out for in my life too. Now, because I know that this naturally nurturing characteristics makes me easy prey, I guard against it and make sure the person I am giving doesn’t mind reciprocating. Because weather in a romantic relationship, a family relationship, or even co-workers and friendships, it is important that the relationship be mutually beneficial.
The other thing that I have have read and had to guard against, is the seeming attraction between a narcissist and an empath. A narcissist will destroy anyone and anything that is in their path, and especially someone who is willing to give, with a seemingly endless supply. My last relationship was with a narcissist, and indeed if I gave an inch he insisted on two miles.
At this point in my life as an empath, I want to take care of those I love without all the drama. I want a peaceful, loving home where there is no yelling and fighting. I want dinners eaten around the family dinner table, with laughter and talk of the days events. I want someone who supports me and who is kind. Someone with endless amount empathy and compassion. Basically, I want another empath.
Because it seems the best relationship is one where you support and help each other. So if you take two givers and put them together, each of the functioning to take care of the other, then wouldn’t that be the ideal? Instead of one taking and using, both are nurturing.
I want that 1950s life with a loving partner. I want to serve my partner, because I love him. I want to be submissive (gasp!). I want to celebrate taking care of each other and buildibg a beautiful, intricate life where burdens are shared. I want to truly celebrate being an empath instead of having to be weary of being used for it.
In this day and age of everyone being so independant and unwilling to give, is that even possible? Yes, I think so. At least I hope so. But it takes a very strong man to handle an independant woman who chooses to be submissive. Because submission does not mean being controlled or ordered around. It means you do for the other because you love. And when you are allowed to love that way, both flourish. My Mom explained that to me a long time ago. You take care of and cherish each other.
And so that is the path and intention I want in my life moving forward, at least for my personal life.
Life is short. Be kind, be supportive, be loving. Because in the end, all we have is the way others remember us and love that is shared. And you can’t take it with you, so give it away as much as you can. Just make sure it’s to the right people. And that is the empaths path.
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