What Going Home Does to You Soul

It wasn’t supposed to be a fun trip.  It was supposed to be a trip to support one of my best friends as her brother is gravely ill.  And then the unexpected happen.  All of us, the group that has known each other since we were 12, the group who that has been through everything together, got back together.

And there we all were, laughing, talking, drinking, crying, eating and loving each other.  Ad in that instant I knew that I would never be without family again. These people, who have loved me through all the stupid things, are my people.  And I am theirs.  In that moment I knew that no matter where I am, I will never be alone.

And there is such a beauty and grace in this realization, as the next chapter of life unfolds.

So many times we hear that you cannot go home, but in fact you can.  Many times home, those places you know like the back of your hand, and those people who know you are the ones who become your heart. And there is tremendous comfort in that which is familiar.

And after dinner with my friends, I got up the next morning and went to church in my own home parish. My spiritual home, where I grew up, the first place I found true friends, love and drank communion wine (on a dare).  It was the place where my parents had their memorial services. It is where my Mom worked hard and created beautiful gardens for everyone. And in one of those gardens was my “thinking swing.” I spent countless night in that swing, sometimes all night, swinging and thinking, planning and dreaming about life.

My hometown. Where I grew up, a place where the people know my heart, they are my heart. And isn’t that the thing about life?  We all have a history, we all have a past.  We all have those who know us inside and out, before we became adults and learned about walls and masks and being politically correct.  We all have places where we know the roads, and the roads know us.  We all have those places that make us smile.  We all have a place where we grew up. We all have those places that refill our souls and remind us of who we are.

The Fruition of a Passionate Soul on Fire

My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.  – Maya Angelou

There are times in life when you just feel the electricity in the  air.  It is the energy of possibilities of the future. There is a shift, and all of the sudden you are sensitive to everything that is within your grasp. And it is exciting. Maybe it happens after a hard time. Or maybe after working hard, and after the dust clears, you see a glimpse of the future. Maybe it is an “ah-ha” moment, when the light comes on in your mind. Who knows, but no matter the source, the energy is undeniable.

There is a fire within me, burns from my soul to and goes where the heart meets the mind. After a few years of sleeping, the passion has awakened and I am excited about all of the possibilities in the future. I have set my intentions – the latest contract, remote freelance, personal business and investment goals.  Fitness goals, travel and fun.

I have more energy than I have had in a long time, even if I have a hard time keeping focused.

There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living. – Nelson Mandela

I am acutely aware that everything for which I have prayed, I have been given.  By the Grace of God go I. There has been a lot of work and a lot of preparation, but in two months, the landscape of life will look completely different. This is extremely exciting.

And what is also exciting is when you see everything lining up with your goals and aspirations. You work hard in this life, dream big, pour your heart and soul, blood, sweat and tears into building the life that you want. And then, you see the light at the end of the tunnel. You see things lining up, you feel those dreams getting closer.  And you cannot wait, excitement brimming from every part of you.

This is where I am. A friend of mine sent me a massage saying that she loved seeing all of my happy posts on social media.  What is even better than seeing them, is posting them. Know that this is my time. But it is more than that.  There is a deeper happiness, a deeper appreciation, a deeper sense of self and satisfaction than ever before.

Patience has never been my strong point, and I am anxious for these changes and the new good to start.  But there are moments here to still savor.  There is so much beauty in where I am, and where I am going, that I do not want to miss a single moment. Every breath, every heartbeat, every second, is a gift filled with all the magic mysteries of life.  And I am beyond grateful for all of them.

Finally, this little life that has been under construction for so long, is about to break free, shiny, new, and glorious. Life is short.  Make it good.