Motivation and Beliefs

I wrote this a few years ago…and it is very timely now…Enjoy!

When I was a little girl, I was told I could do anything. Somehow in adult hood, and the search for the perfect job, partner, car, life, that gets washed away. Somehow we still have to get up in the morning, face the world, and somehow find the motivation to believe. Believe, against the odds, against what we hear on the news, the stories we see in the paper – that we still can do everything and anything we want.

We all go through those times in our life where we are so overwhelmed by what we have left to do to get to that road of success, that we just freeze up and do nothing…not even knowing where to begin. We know where we want to be, but seem to be surrounded by fog and have no idea which way to go to even start the journey. We have lost not only motivation, but also direction. We feel lost…a very small boat in a big sea of uncertainty. How do we get back to land, back to a safe harbor?

Motivation is, in essence, a system of belief. We must believe, everyday, that we have the power to make our dreams come true. And this takes a lot of work. One of the biggest misconceptions is that being confident and happy is easy. It’s not. Dolly Parton once said “It takes a lot of money to look this cheap.”…well, it takes a lot of work to make happiness and optimism look this easy.

First you must make the decision to be motivated and happy, and then you must re-make that decision every day. You must decide everyday when you get up to believe in motivation. The following are the decisions of belief I re-make every day.

Belief you are not alone -Think you are special in your circumstances and de-motivation? You’re not. There are thousands just like you everywhere in the world. You are very special – because you are unique and gifted – not because of your circumstance. The only reason your circumstances are important to you is because they affect you and your world. The gift in that is that you are not alone. Everyone has been where you are right now, and everyone understands. We all go through it many times in our life.

It also means that because there are so many who have been or are in the same spot you are in, that there will be few guests at a pity party should you throw one for yourself. That means it may be time to get off your tail and do something. In other words (to quote a great Southern saying): “Get off the cross honey, other people need the wood!”

It means you must realize you are strong and capable enough to make your goals come to fruition. You have everything you need right there inside of you. All you have to do is believe in yourself, reach deep down inside and pull it out.

Belief in abundance -Repeat these words to yourself every day, every hour…every time you start to feel scared or discouraged: There is an abundance of work, there is an abundance of jobs, there is an abundance of money. And there is. There are more resources and abundance in the universe that we could ever know what to do with. And you deserve all that you want.

Belief in the Universe- It is impossible for you to fail. It is against all the laws of the Universe for you to fail. Repeat this often. And know that it is true. Everything in the universe wants us (you) to be happy and successful. The whole universe exists for you to happy and successful. And because of this, it is impossible for you to fail at anything. When you try something and it doesn’t work, that is not a failure, it is a lesson. And it is because there is something better waiting for you. You must believe this with all your heart. Whatever you need, will be there for you. Because you cannot fail. You were not meant to fail.
Sometimes we get so attached to an idea – like wanting a certain job – and we get so fixated on that that we don’t see that there is a better option for us…but the Universe sees it and will place us it the path of success whether we like it or not. Think about trying to swim up the current of a fast river…why would you do this? All you have to do is stop fighting it. Go with the flow and current of the Universe. The flow will take you were you are supposed to go.

Belief in being stubborn – Defiance is a good thing. Defy all those who doubt you, be stubborn enough to proof them wrong. So many times we believe the doubts that other people say and put into our heads. We believe the news about the unemployment rates, about the housing market, about everything negative…it is hard to believe that we would be the one to beat the odds. But you can. You have everything you need already there to beat any odds you want. Be stubborn. Be defiant. Be the one that can flip them off and say “you were wrong.”

Belief in yourself- Believe that you truly can do whatever you want, that everything you need is already inside you. Believe it because it is true. Everything you need is there, inside you, waiting to come out. You have every tool, every talent, every everything already. All you have to do is believe it.

Belief that it will be – Businesswoman, human rights activist and environmental campaigner Anita Roddick said “To succeed you have to believe in something with such a passion that it becomes a reality.” We could all learn from this simple, yet incredibly complex statement. If we believe with the passion of every fiber in our being, it will be. Believe in your abilities, your life, your passion and most of all YOU.

Belief in being open to change – Change is coming…so you might as well welcome it. This goes along with going with the flow. You may not know where you are going end up, and the fear of the unknown may rare it’s ugly head now and then, but if you are open to change, you will find it sooner rather than later. You will also find yourself having a better adventure during a time of change if you have a good attitude about it than if you don’t. It’s coming, whether you like it or are ready for it or not. You might as well enjoy the ride.
Belief that it’s not about the sale – when you talk to people in the coffee shop, networking group – or wherever – remember it’s not about the sale. If you talk to people with just the purpose of meeting people to get customers for your company they will say no. Simply meet people. It’s not about the sale. It’s about talking and learning about people. Ask questions. Be genuinely interested in their answers. They will respond and remember you. If the opportunity comes up great , if not you just met a cool person.

Belief that it’s not about them, it’s about you – Because it is. When we are not sure of where we are going it is easy to follow others paths…then we find that we are not where we should or need to be. It’s not about them, it’s about you. Sit quiet, be still and listen to who you are. Remember who you are. This is your life and today is not a dress rehearsal. How do you want your life to be? Forget about them, this is about you. It’s OK to be selfish enough to listen to what you want and how you want your life to be, what will make you happy and what you need. It’s not about them, it’s about you.

Belief in the subconscious- Goal boards, lists, motivational sayings on the fridge, and pictures of what you want to accomplish, they may sound a bit corny – but they work. Decide what you want and put it in front of you every day. This is a very powerful subconscious reminder…while we are doing what we do every day, we will subconsciously do things that lead us to what is in front of us. So make what is in front of you where you want to be.

Believe in your friends –You have surrounded yourself with loyal friends who know and love you no matter what. Lean on them, vent to them, let them inspire and motivate you when you are low. Asking for help has been especially hard for me…it’s not bad or weak for someone else to ask for help, but somehow it is for me. That is bull and I know it…but I still feel it. I have to stop it – and so do you. I have swallowed my pride (a hard thing for a proud southern girl like me to do) and asked my friends and family for help. You know what I found? So much help I didn’t know what to do with it all! The people who love me where more than happy to help me; they wanted to help me.
Another thing you must realize is that sometimes it is a giving a gift to someone when you ask them for help. It is allowing that other person to give something of themselves, and that is tremendous – especially if it is someone who you have helped in the past. It allows them to return the favor. Don’t be selfish…allow your friends the gift of helping you.

The Origins of Compassion

I was once told that compassion must be earned.  I’ll just leave this right here…

We all have things in which we wonder. We all have questions to which we seek answers. One of those questions for me is what is the origin of compassion? From where does it come? Where is that spark first ignited? Compassion literally means come with passion. But it is much more than just that. It is to share suffering and feeling the pain with someone, to share the vulnerability of being known. And yet it is more than a necessity, in my opinion, it is survival. We must have compassion for those around us. We must take care of those we love and be there for them, serve them, with compassion.

 

When it comes to compassion, and just in general, you can’t force the heart. You either feel it or you don’t. You cannot press a bottom and make it appear. Genuine compassion cannot be composed. And true compassion is a hard thing, especially when we are tired or worn out ourselves and feel like we have nothing to give. So from where does compassion begin? And why is it that some are much more compassionate than others?

 

I don’t know why others seem to be born with more compassion than others, but I do have a theory of how it starts otherwise. I think that living life and going through struggles of our own gives us compassion for others. God takes us through the journey of our life, gives us these experiences, so that we might understand and be compassionate to those around us. The struggles we experience strip us down until there is nothing left, no ego, no pride, no superficiality, just our true selves at the core. This experience, this vulnerability is the birth of compassion.

 

We are often like wet cement, and the events of life mold us to be the people we are supposed to become. You follow a journey that transforms your heart to compassionate space. It is a process. As we go through life , the hard times and experiences we have carve out deep spaces within us. And each time we hurt, we hurt a little deeper, so that each time we feel joy or love, we feel it deeper too. Our emotions fill up those spaces from the depths of our soul outward.

 

I also think a little time alone helps develop compassion. Solitude often lets us get back to our true authentic selves by getting us away from the noise of outside distractions. We prioritize, contemplate and listen deep. Once we get rid of distractions, we are able to sit still and listen, to ourselves, to God, to the hum of the inner Divine – that part of ourselves in which God truly lives. Some call it the soul, some call it the inner self. Regardless of the name, I think this is where compassion lives

 

I also think compassion is God’s gift to the Human race. To have the ability to share and lighten the load, to be a shoulder. Compassion can help heal a broken soul, sooth a hurt, fix a bad day or make someone smile. Every day I strive to be a better more compassionate person. And hopefully I succeed a little more every day too. And maybe if we all try a little every day, we can make the world just a little better every day. Sound corny? Just try it…