It starts about this time every year. It is a restlessness for the Fall. Winter is a time of hibernation for me – long cold days wrapped up in a blanket by a fire. So the fall is a time to get out and enjoy life before the winter sets in. I start wanting to go, to see, to travel. I start getting restless for all the things that I want to do before the cold sets in.
Because Fall is wrapping up the year, it is crisp mornings and cool evenings. It is wine and conversations, it is the start of new friendships and adventures. It is a cabin in the mountains, wine tastings, good hikes and fresh air. It is laughter and pumpkins and festivals and snuggling on the couch. October is wonderful. It is one of my favorite times of the year as it is the in-between.
And maybe that is why I feel restless, because it is the in between the lines of life. After the summer but before the holidays. And I find myself in between as well. Past all the rough, but before all the amazing. It is a time of set up….Where I am ready but God and the Universe are setting everything up for forward movement. And I get impatient. When I decide I want something, I want it then, I do not like to have to wait. Sometimes patience is not my best virtue. Maybe it is a byproduct of being a passionate red head.
For me, I want to explore, to adventure, to climb, to go, to kiss, to see, to eat, drink and be marry. I want to experience life again, with a whole heart, open eyes and big smile.
For now I just enjoy this time, when I put another blanket on the bed and sleep under it’s wonderful weight. When I set up the fireplace, and prepare for the feast that is coming into my life. I know that it will be delicious. The hardest part is finding which direction I should go. Which direction is love, happiness and Peace? I have found it within, now I do not want to go without in the world.
And so pour some wine, talk to friends and remember to be present in this moment, right here in front of me. Because I do not want to miss any amazing moments now because I am looking ahead. And that is where the balance lies. This is something on which I am working. I tend to get so busy working on the further that I forget to relax in the now.
So maybe this restless in between time is for me to slow down, relax, take a breath and enjoy the hard work which I have done. I have climbed quite a long way up from where I found myself just months ago. And now I breath, before taking risks and throwing myself completely into life. Join me in the adventure. But hang on tight, because it is going to be quite a ride. But then again, Life always is.
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