Fall Fantasies

There is a time when you can feel the air change, and you know it is the change of seasons.  You can feel it, sense it, and taste it.  This is where I am not, figuratively and literally. The air is much cooler over the last few days and the freshness tastes delicious.  It is the flavor of all the new possibilities coming down the line.

The summer has been long and arduous.  But much growth has happened, which has taken me out of for the change that we need in life. But isn’t that the case in life?  Being outside of our comfort zone is often the precipice for change.  Whether we are placed there by circumstances outside of our control, or we walk outside on your own, everything we want is on the other side of fear.

And I am tired of the discomfort that has been present this summer.  It has been hard, and now that the air is cooler I know that change is coming. I have grown out of my skin so it is time to shed my old self and make a new life. I know that it is time to let go and breathe easy.  It is time to explore and see the world around me with new eyes. I have no one but myself, so I will make this the life that I want and have always dreamed.

And this is exciting.  I am free, I have a wonderful support system and love is everywhere around me. It is time for the move; it is time to make more memories, go to festivals, drink cider, pick apples, enjoy the changing of the leaves and the cool weather.  It is time to not be weighed down by the past and those in it.

It is time for…fun.  It is time for fall. Which for me is this magical, wonderful time after the activities of the summer and before the rush of the winter.  And make no mistake, it is fully my intention to enjoy every moment, every second, every bit of laughter and fun and sunshine and rain and day and night.


This is a bit of a strange week for me as it is packed with anniversaries and birthdays.

The biggest one is Labor Day as it was Dad’s birthday, September 2nd. The Four -Pack always celebrated by heading down to the family compound and sharing beer, food, laughter and gifts  – and socks. I always had to give him socks.  It‘s a tradition.

I have done the Mother’s Day thing. I celebrated Mom’s Birthday, both the first since she passed.  And I have celebrated Fathers  Day…but what do I do for my father’s 81st birthday? Celebrate in way that would make him happy.

This will be a wonderful holiday weekend of friends and family and love and laughter and new.  Of renewed heartbeats and faith and hope. And sunsets and sunrises and adventure.

August 29 was an anniversary of sorts too. It was six years ago that I was brutally strangled. It took yeas for the legal fight to be over and years to recover emotionally as well.  So why would I celebrate? Because I remember saying that one day I hope that I don’t even remember the date because my  life is so full that there is no room for that memory.  Indeed my life is that full.  I did not remember it until a friend reminded me.  And it dawned on me..I was so busy and happy and fulfilled that I didn’t even notice.

I was also going to get married on my Father’s birthday that year, in Barbados.  Not many people know that.  It was a beautiful area, with an arch on the cliffs right above the water.  I am also grateful for the wonderful, amazing people I met on that trip, who are still friends with me to this day.

And so it is, this holiday weekend of celebration.  Starting off with a  homemade dinner with family and friends – another dinner party.  I love when my house is full and memories are made. Then an out of town trip with more people dear to my heart, for hard work, hard play and maybe a ride in a hot air balloon.

And that is how I will honor and celebrate my father, myself and this life that has been given to me.